1st habit: Be proactive

Whether you know it ore not, your life doesn’t just happen. It’s carefully designed by you. It’s your walk on the earth.

When you try to be proactive, you try to be responsible for your own life. You will see that you try to solve the problems not by blaming others but to recognize your part in the issue/problem/thing. An example is the circle of influence (underneath this blog). When your an proactive person you will try to place all the positive persons close to you. And the ones who have an bad influence on you as far as you can. Also is it your own choice how many people you place in that circle.

When you are an reactive person you blame others. You are over thinking things, and feel a victim in everything that happens around you. Instead of thinking “I will” ore “I can” you probably think “I have to” ore “I can’t”.

So by being aware of these circles it’s important to try be open to new things. When you open up and not over think to much you’ll see you will learn so much more, meet new people and gain new experiences. And by making mistakes in the mean time you gain knowledge that you’ll take with you the rest of your life.

werk bestand


7 Habits

Stephen Covey was the man who wrote about “The seven habits of highly effective people”. His book was first published in 1989. Since that moment 25 million copies are sold in 38 languages.

He wrote the book because he thought that these 7 habits would help you to success, and to change your mindset.  Its a very interesting way of thinking and living. And when you use this method you’ll notice that it is really useful in life. In my next post I will write more about each habit. Underneath you’ll find the subjects.

  1. Be proactive
  2. Begin with the end in mind
  3. First things first
  4. Win – Win
  5. Seek first to understand, then to be understood
  6. Synergy
  7. Sharpen the saw / Renewal



Pathways to Youthwork

Pathways to Youth work is an international training course that helps you to go to your own roots of who you are as a person and become a stronger and better leader. The whole training is inspired by Stephen Covey and his 7 habits.

The trainings is given by 5 trainers and 1 dog. We learn by doing all these exercises and games and that makes everything a lot of fun. In my opinion that is one of the best learning methods there is. Because you don’t recognise that you’re learning things, but in the meantime your already doing it. When you finish this training with success you’ll be walking away with a lot of new experiences, things to think about, a badge for effective leadership, a platinum youth achievement award, a youthpass certificate and a piece for Council of Europe portfolio.


In the evening after a whole day of training we play games. And were very competitive. Werewolf, doble, ninja, love letters, uno, etc. etc. It’s a lot of fun and there is a lot of noise. It helps to connect with each other and make a very strong bond.

Everyone is there for you. They all want to help en support you when something is hard for you. Within this training course I gained a lot of new contact and a treasured new family. They help you to rise above yourself.


Jong Nederland

Jong Nederland or Young Netherlands. Is an organisation true the Netherlands who do activities with the youth in their community. You have your own group once a week in one age category. You teach them principles and help them to become the person they want to be.

Once a year you go camping in nature for a week. No toilets, showers and power. The rest of the time you do creative activities, fundraising, sports and you be there for each other. Due the circumstances I had to stop for a moment, but I want do this again after I worked on myself.

Follow the bord Jeugdwerk from Samantha on Pinterest.


Rose from Leary

Rose from Leary is communication model. After loads of research the American psygologist Timothy Leary found a way to predict people’s reaction. The method gives you insight to make conscious choice’s in your conversations and actions. It helps you to recognise behaviour.

For example: In the morning when you get to the bus stop everyone reacts differently. Some people want to be left alone, some are loud, some want to talk, etc. etc. When your loud you can expect a reaction if you can be quiet.


Action → Reaction
Cause → Effect
Sending → receiving

In an conversation you can switch really quick between the boxes. This method comes in handy when you have a hard conversation. It helps you to analyse their behaviour and in that way to help you understand them better. You can react responsive to their behaviour.

Roos van Leary

It’s good to keep in mind that the behaviour is not by definition wrong. Every reaction had his cause. And you need all the boxes. When you take one away you lose the balance you need. By being flexible in the boxes you can change the behaviour of the person you’re working/talking with. Underneath here you see a table how you recognise verbal and nonverbal behaviour.

Non verbal
Clearly visible and audible
Eye contact
Ask questions
Seek confirmation
Search conflicts
Critical Questions
Show cynicism and disgust
Pronouncing threats  
Instant visible and audible
Display arrogance
Showing disgust

How you behave is your own choice. So ask yourself the question where do you want to be in the rose?

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Kidzz & Armoede

Kidzz & armoede or children and poorness. We give lessons in awareness to poorness. We do this in elementary (special/normal) and high school. In that way we try to make this hard subject more understandable and more open for conversation. They are the future. So when they dare to talk about it, the problem will become more solvable.

NaamloosFollow the page Kidzz&Armoede from Samantha on Pinterest.

The children in elementary school played a lot more outside after our lessens. Also they were more excepting about other children and how they responded at certain situations. With the elementary school we organised a special day for children whose parent had to go to food banks. We did this at a cow farm. The pictures you see in the gallery above are pictures from the school and children of the volunteers on the day itself. We’ve also raised toys for the Christmas days and gave them away at the food bank. The video underneath here is in Dutch but were talking about the fundraising we did.

We’ve notices that in especially in high school there was a need for lessons like we give. This because these children went for collage the next year.  They learned more about budgets and how to for grocery shopping. After the lessons we heard from parents that the children didn’t wanted there extra bottle of coke ore their bag of crisps because they didn’t  need that. After their project they made these newspapers and handed that over to the municipality. They then took that into one of their meetings and try to make some changes with the tips and tricks from the youngsters.


My part in all this is to give the lessons to the children and guide them true the entire process. Me and my colleges also gave training to the volunteers and to support them. We also give lessons to other youth workers and to people who work within governments. This so people can take our program and can try to start a program in their own region. In this al we always play the games with the youth workers/other people and in that they see how confronting it could be but also how useful this method is to get a discussion. My part in that is to give the lessens and start the discussions and were I can’t go further my colleges jump in.

This school year we started out late. But were still going to do the project.


Paradigms & Princeples

I want to explain more about paradigms and principles. First I begin with the paradigms. It was quite an eye-opener for me because I never heard the word or the explanation before.

A paradigm could be about anything. It’s a belief about what influences you as a person. You build them on experiences, religion, family, culture, friends, etc. etc. Everything can change the way you think about a paradigm.

For example: when you’re a child you believe in Santa, but at a certain age you may have really good reasons why you don’t believe in Santa any more.

You should see it like a table. Your paradigm is the table top and you build it on the table legs. You can reinforce the table by putting some extra legs underneath the table top. In that way you can strengthening your belief in it as being true. By thinking in this way you can also break some negative beliefs down. You do this by removing the legs. You take away the belief behind the paradigm.

I’m going to use this method to change or strengthen the opinion for the people I help or for myself. Principles are in my eyes things that you see as your personal rules. They help you to frame your own actions. Some of them will be inherited from family or parents, others are cultural or religious. They are different for everybody. Some principles are permanent and others are temporarily. This because they can change true experiences, situations or environments etc.

You can put the principle in the middle. For example loyalty. And around it the things that could influence the principle, like friends, family, religion, culture, etc. etc.